Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Seriously, Make a Decision!

Hello! I'm here to talk about British culture from what I've noticed lately. Stereotypically British people like tea. British people love tea. British people love anything that involves tea, such as biscuits....and....tea biscuits....and limp biscuits. Just kidding! But seriously, here's the kicker. THEY ALSO LOVE COFFEE! Seriously, I'm not kidding. It's like, choose a hot beverage you know? It's either one or the other, you can't have both. If you go to a restaurant and they offer you hot beverages with your dessert, they say, "tea or coffee?" And if you were American you would pick one, but if you were British would you just say....yes? Am I right? I'm so right.

On to other news!! Thanksgiving in England?

Do they celebrate it? Do they think about it? Why would they think about it? Actually, they should think about it.

Listen, okay. I don't really know any pilgrims personally, but couldn't you just imagine how ANNOYING they were? They left so that they could start a new life, because obviously they weren't liking the lives they had, right? So clearly they did A LOT of complaining in England. And then they left!! So shouldn't we be celebrating the fact that on this day, England's most obnoxious and annoying residents decided to pick up and leave without having being asked to? That's like if my obnoxious next door neighbors kids who ride their ATV's on our property were to get hit by cars and die and we wouldn't have to deal with them anymore. That would be a win for us, right? Just like this was a win for England. So shouldn't we be celebrating this win? Either that or I just want to eat turkey.

Well, that is that! Come back next time and read about more exciting events that you might want to attend.

Here is another review of our blog! Thanks for the review! Very helpful, indeed!

"This blog is really good for good hard facts. Brought to you by real hard people. Nothing better than a hard person giving you the facts, hardly." - Huffington Post

Love, Jonny

Monday, November 23, 2009

Hello to all!!

Hi!! Jonny here, just to let you know that I (Jonny Rogoff), and Anthony (Anthony Gobeille) are starting a blog because it's the popular things to do, but mostly because we just want a place where millions of people are going to read every word we write because our words are so sought after, and we also want a place where we can tell you about upcoming events that you might be interested in, or not interested in, but still might find it interesting. Our first event is coming up soon so MARK YOUR CALENDARS. January 17 there will be a "Teen Pregnancy Aint' So Bad!!" night, at the YMCA in Randolph, New Jersey. Heres a little bit about the event as written by the French director Heimrich Manuevre himself! "It's kind of like this. You've been pregnant for some time now, and people laugh and point at you when you walk by. It's like Juno, except it's not a horrible movie, and it's real life. But now, is your chance to maybe sit down and laugh with other pregnant teens about how you got pregnant and maybe chuckle about about how THEY got pregnant too. It's really a lot of fun for you and your lack of family."

The second event I'd like to talk about actually comes before the first event I talked about. It is on December 22, just in time for Christfest!! It's called "Hot Pockets for Handlers." And this one brings together the dog loving community. Don't you just wish you could meet other handlers outside of dog shows, or other such competitive events? I mean, how do you expect to make friends at a dog show if your poodle is pooping in the cage? Well this event brings together people whose lives are run by dogs. Seriously, dogs run these peoples lives, it's sad, SO COME ON DOWN!! And have yourself a hot pocket and talk about your hot dog!!

In addition, this blog will be used for any other thing we write about. If we're mad, we'll write about it. If we're happy we'll write about it. If you're happy we won't write about it, because frankly we just don't care. WELCOME TO BREAKFAST EFFECTUS!!!!!

Listed below is a review that we have already received from a disrespected source!!

"This blog is great, and good also." - NY Times

Love, Jonny